Posted By: mexgirl on January 27, 2010

Q:

Hi,
I'm 21, and I just officially came out about a year ago and I've had three girlfriends, (one who I just broke up with) and I don't really know many lesbians. I have a very large straight circle of friends but no real gay friends. So, I finally got the courage to ask some friends (all straight) to go with me to a gay bar/café so that I could meet people but I have no idea how to go up and talk to someone, and I'm really nervous. Any ideas on how "integrate" myself into the gay community?
Thanks so much! I love the show!!
Hey from Mexico!!

A:

Hi from the United States!

I would sign up on social networking sites, in addition to going to bars/cafes to meet women. As corny as it sounds, my girlfriend was moving here from another state and added a bunch of women on myspace in the search "lesbian" and I just so happened to change my status to that. There's also a bunch of queer dating sites, although I'm not sure what is local to Mexico. Just google it and I'm sure you'll find a bunch!

As for approaching women in public settings, it's always easy to compliment someone on something you like about them. I started talking to one girl because we kept staring at each other and she finally inched her way over towards my direction and I said I liked her belt and we started talking the rest of the night. Also, how did you meet your previous girlfriends? You had luck meeting them somehow, right? I'm sure you'll be just fine in integrating yourself into the lesbian community!

Thanks for listening!
Charlie